Feed His Mind

Written by on August 16, 2018

My darlyns, what do you think of a wife that doesn’t spice up her dress sense to gain her husband’s attention? It is no news that men are attracted by what they see, I am not asking you to dress indecently but you can still be sexually attractive to your husband in a decent way.

No matter how spiritual or deeply rooted you are in God’s word, he is your man, your husband, the partner given to you by God, so you rock his world as much as he rocks yours.

This brings me to the question, “Does a woman’s dressing affect her husband’s sexual attraction towards her?” my answer is yes!

Now let me tell a story about a friend of mine, Christabel. She was very popular during our university days because of her alluring dress sense. In fact, she was one of the top ten Fashionistas on campus. Few years after graduation, she got married to a well to do man who is the managing director of one of the giant banks in Nigeria. Seven years into her marriage, she was blessed with two kids (a boy and a girl).

One cool evening, I was sipping a cup coffee on my reading desk; my phone started ringing so I had to quickly go get it from the sitting room where it was charging. I took a glance at my phone and discovered it was Christabel who was calling. I accepted the call and started the whole famzing and exchanging of pleasantries as we usually did whenever we saw each other or spoke on phone, but the tone of her voice changed the vibe of the call entirely. I had to take another glance at my phone to be sure I was talking to my very own Christabel; the one who had the most enthusiastic and positive energy among my friends.

She was sobbing bitterly, I could tell from the sound of her voice. At that point, the rate of my heart beat had increased, I didn’t know how bad the situation was. It’s been over 8 months since I last saw her, but we talk on the phone on a regular basis.

Christy! What’s wrong? What is the problem? Talk to me. She replied, “babe my husband doesn’t have my time anymore, I don’t know if I’m allowed to say this, but he doesn’t love me anymore”. This made me run cold feet. How could it be? Damy never took Christabel for granted. I have always admired their marriage; they were stronger than love birds. What could have gone wrong? I have known Damy as a man who wouldn’t allow anything or anyone hurt his wife. He was always giving her this lovey-dovey care and attention. All these ran through my mind.

Aah!! She was still sobbing. It was late evening so I had to promise coming to see her the following day at her husband’s place on the island. I needed to see her urgently to know exactly what the problem was and survey the couple myself.

The following morning, I woke up early and got dressed, it was a cold morning with a heavy down pour. My kids were on midterm break, so I didn’t bother about the necessary school run. I  said to myself “this rain you can’t stop me from going to the island today”. I took off with my car to Christy’s house. On getting there, my friend came out with a wrapper tied to her chest to welcome me; I was surprised. Is this the Christy I know? I didn’t say anything. I stayed with her, she had her bath and still continued her wrapper tying until her husband got back from work in the evening. We greeted very well, but I saw the look on his face when he looked at his wife where both of us sat on the cushion. That moment I sensed what the problem was, I tapped her, Christy, is this the way you dress to stay at home? She said “hmm babes abeg ooh, my dressing is not my problem, let me just face this children, they are important. I don’t want to wear anything that will make me uncomfortable, so whenever I’m home, I tie wrapper or wear lose free gowns”.  That was when I knew my assumptions were right. I started talking to her, I told her, see babes, I’m not saying shouldn’t take care of your kids but you also have to take care of your body, the way you dress, whether indoors or outside your home.

I made her understand that she was making herself look like a granny when she is still young and vibrant. I reminded her of her husband’s line of work which exposes him to classic ladies that dress to make a statement. I told her, “Christabel, you need to always look attractive for your husband no matter what”.
After two months she called me, full of excitement. She thanked me and told me of how her husband now handles her like a piece of cake after she heeded to my advice.
My darlyns, you know how attractive you were when your man first had interest in you, try to up your game, don’t relent, continue in that manner. I know sometimes the challenges in life, family problems, kid’s seeking attention, and many more, drifts us from our personal care and maintenance as a woman. Please don’t lose your shine and sexiness, it matters a lot to our dear husbands and also boosts their sexual attraction.

From the discussions I had with a male friend and business partner he said;

A woman’s dressing either makes the sex experience increase or decrease, because if she dresses anyhow it turns the man off and can be one of the factors that leads a man to stare at other women”.

As a wife one of your primary aim should be to satisfy your husband’s sexual desire and keep him attracted to you.

  1. Splurge more on sexy lingerie
  2. Package your body let him see the wonderful shape God gave his wife.
  3. Wear more of short skimpy wears when at home (for goodness sake he is your man)
  4. Dress decently attractive when going out
  5. Spice up your fashion sense (you don’t have to buy expensive wears, look for the ones you can afford and look beautiful in your own style.

Finally my darlyns, your husband will desire you more if you are better looking and attractive. Just as I said earlier on, “men are attracted or moved by what they see”. In addition to that, they say, “being attractive lasts longer than being pretty”. My friend Christabel is a very pretty lady but at some point in her marriage, she lost her charm.

If you have suggestions on how to increase the sexual attraction in relationships and marriages please feel free to write them on the comment box below. Let’s all learn together.


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