Love and Patience

My darlyns, how do we manage the storms in marriage when they become very windy? Certainly, there will be storms and childlessness is one of the major storms affecting marriages prior to our existence.

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Every planting season is followed by a harvesting period, we all know this. What happens when the seeds planted refuse to germinate? This is where patience comes into play. It is expected that as couples, you should produce children. In some African homes ,when the couple stays for two years without children, the mother in-law begins to wonder and ponder what the problem is, when the case extends to five years or more you see her finding errors in little things you do; she begins to complain how the woman doesn’t fry egg well, how the follicle from your hair litters the whole compound.

My darlyns, how do we manage the storms in marriage when they become very windy? Certainly, there will be storms and childlessness is one of the major storms affecting marriages prior to our existence. I know you’ve heard this before “God gives children” the woman doesn’t and the man doesn’t. The woman serves an incubator to nurture the being created by God. We really need to digest this point and realise that our only duty is to pray to God for children and not blame or criticize our partner; even when the medical report says otherwise, our faith in God disproves the conclusions of men.

My darlyns, the case of childlessness in marriage can’t be settled with your anger or depression, why not relax and let God do his will? Don’t blame your partner for anything. Build your happiness on the things you love with your spouse and focus on the positive sides of living. When the pressure becomes much from family members, do not listen to them, drive through the crisis with your partner. Build your marriage on other beautiful things of life, such as: nature, paintings, music, helping the poor and needy. Provide each other with physical affection and enjoy your sexual life, being childless doesn’t stop you from satisfying your partner sexually.

I  was privileged to know a couple who have been married for ten years without children. They sought help from everywhere possible and they were devout Christians who never missed any chance to praise the Lord or skip a religious activity. The doctors confirmed that nothing was wrong with both the wife and the husband; still a child wouldn’t come. She kept seeking help and eventually resolved to continue praying to God. Two months after a 21 days fasting and prayer conducted in her church, she discovered she was pregnant. There was celebration like no other and the testimony was that “God’s Time is the Best”. He certainly wouldn’t give you something you aren’t spiritually, physically, psychologically and financially ready for.

Finally, my darlyns it is important we remember that one of the principal reasons of marriage is companionship. So when the seed refuses to germinate water other people’s lives by being a blessing to them. Children they say are gifts from God. When the gift doesn’t come you take solace in the joy of companionship and marriage. Enjoy your marriage and be happy with your partner and in God’s time, children will come.

There are several ways to handle childlessness. Looking for someone to talk to and counsel you on handling childlessness in marriage? You can seek professional help today and book a consultation session with the renowned marriage therapist and relationship expert, “Wittysally” on the homepage.

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